Showing posts from July, 2022

Reconstructing My Paternal Grandfather

Reconstructing My Paternal Grandfather Things our parents tell us that might not be true Anthony Lawrence (Pcunix) HISTORY Beardsley Lawrence Senior with his sister Marianna, family photo Note: I recently wanted to update this story, but couldn’t because apparently I had accidentally deleted it some time ago. Fortunately, I had copied the text elsewhere. Here it is again, with updates. References and citations are at the bottom of this story. Beardsley Lawrence Sr. was my paternal grandfather. I met him only once, when he was dying in a Boston Hospital. I was five years old or younger. I cannot remember much more than my father introducing us. I took his hand and he said something like “Good to meet you, young man.” Was that visit from a dying man’s wish to see his only grandson or simply something my father felt he should do on what may have been his last visit with his father? I do not know. My Aunt Ann, his daughter, told me that when her father was diagnosed with spinal cancer his

My Dangerously Active Nightmares

  A thief was in my room. I saw him plainly. He was big, but that didn’t stop me. Screaming, I jumped up and grabbed him. Anthony Lawrence (Pcunix) Photo by author I am off to dreamland a few minutes after I get into bed. I’m gone so fast that I almost never notice my wife coming to join me a little later. Aside from getting up to pee once or twice, that’s it. I’m out of it until morning. Most of the time. Sometimes my dreams become more alive than they should. There’s a name for this; it’s called REM Sleep Behavior Disorder (RBD or RSBD). It apparently happens mostly to men over sixty. I am well over that age, but.. The Thief The first time it happened to me I was sixteen. I thought a thief was in my room. I saw him plainly. He was a big guy, but that didn’t stop me. With a blood curdling scream I jumped up and grabbed him. I had him by his arms. I was trying to get him down on the ground so that I could subdue him. He was amazingly strong and I wasn’t able to control him. We thrashed